I’ve heard repeatedly that age old phrase of “be careful what you wish for” and it’s often applied to wishing you had more patience. Some even tell me when they pray for patience they seem to get all kinds of opportunities to practice it in some not so fun times! Well, I’d like to develop patience… like now! Why wait? Hehe!
Patience isn’t something you hurry or rush into. Obviously. So wanting it now is a bit of an oxymoron or set up in irony. However, how often have we wanted to just sit back, await great things, and go with the flow? I wish for it a lot, but what I do instead is quite different. I struggle, fight, fuss, and try to force things to happen now all while wishing I were a more patient person. Well, that’s just silly and going with the flow takes… well, letting go. How do you do that?
Timing Is Important
Have you ever noticed that when you let things happen as you gain the knowledge or as it seems “they are supposed to” or “when they occur naturally” that they often work out even better than you might have planned? It seems to hold true. For example, If you had rushed that coaching conversation with Suzie, she wouldn’t have made the great sale first and given you a chance to celebrate while giving feedback, a much easier conversation. Come up with some times in which you know the timing of events was important and remind yourself of those the next time you want to push and rush. Then sit back, let go and release the need to force things.
Forced Behaviors Never Fair as Well as Those That Flow
How much faster do you get things done when you are in the zone? My guess is at a rather rapid rate and with much more satisfying results. Allow yourself the time and attitude to get in the zone before you kick things into high gear. If you are forcing your own behavior, it will not go as well, it will feel like drudgery, and you will become impatient. Find that zone and let it flow out of you as if your energy is endless.
Know When to Lead Yourself and When to Get Out of the Way
Okay, I get it. Sometimes we do just have to muster up the strength to make tough decisions, eat that frog (so to speak), or do those things we don’t like. However, keep in mind the difference between having to overcome fear and procrastination and listening to when your instincts are telling you now is NOT the right time to do that. The difference is subtle at first and gets louder with practice. Lead yourself to “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway” (great book by Susan Jeffers!) and listen to those instincts when they tell your brain to hush and follow your gut.
I’ve about decided patience is a learned skill for those of us who prefer to “do” stuff regularly. It’s almost like we “doers” spend a great deal of time bragging about how busy we are, how stressed we feel, and how much we’ve tried to cram into one day! We even think that somehow Type A is a compliment, when it was actually the label given to the dead people in a Stress induced death study done in the 70s. But the ones who get it seem to get much less wrapped around the axle about the small stuff. They really don’t sweat the small stuff and they really do seem happier with their own sense of patience, timing, and trust. So how do you learn patience, well you just let go, like now… like right now… let go and go with the flow.